Jillian Michaels. You know her. That trainer from The Biggest Loser. She knows how to push buttons. Especially emotional ones that leave the contestants crying, walking off and letting out sob stories about why they are really fat. (I have to admit - this part of the show usually makes me tear up too.) Point being, you know Jillian. You want to hug her and punch her in the face...all at the same time.
Well today - quite frankly, I wanted to give Jillian a swift, quick kick in the ass. Especially when she said the following:
"If you're looking for a modified version of the jumping jacks, look elsewhere. 400 pound people can do it - so can you."
Jillian - I got your modified version of a jumping jack.
I bought her DVD "30 Day Shred". In part because I needed a guided toning workout. Sure, I see all those pieces of equipment at the gym but have no idea how to work them - I need a hot guy to show me how (: (Perhaps I should play up the whole "Excuse me sir, I don't know how this works. Can you show me?" dumb blonde routine. Only thing is...I really don't know how those machines work. So...back to the point - 30 Day Shred video.
You are supposed to do the video every day for 30 days and increase in intensity every 10 days (there are 3 separate workouts on the DVD; one for days 1-10, one for days 11-20 and one for days 21-30. It's a 30-minute video that includes 3 segments of the following: 3 minute strength moves, 2 minutes of cardio and 1 minute of abs. All to equal about 30ish minutes with a warm-up and cool-down. I took my measurements beforehand and will share after 30 days what the results are. Right now, it's just too depressing.
On day one, I was totally clueless. Yea! The excitement of a new video! Day two, I knew what I was in for...and I was sore from day one. So day two sucked. Day three was worse. I was even more sore from days one and two. Day three (today), I acted like a 5 year old who didn't want to go to bed. I was thinking of every excuse possible to not do the video...here's the run-down...
Put the DVD in the player...
I think I need to use the bathroom...
I need some water...
Better check my facebook...
We need extra toilet paper in the spare bathroom...
I need some more water...
I need a straw for my water...
Push start on DVD player...
Push pause on DVD player...need to open front door - it's hot...
Push start on DVD player (again)...
18 minutes into the video my sister calls...an excuse to pause the video again
Resume video and complete...
Tell Jillian she is the anti-christ...
3 days down, 27 to go.
Satan in shorty shorts,huh?
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